The Veggie Avenger is at his friend Stu's house, watching the ballgame on television and drinking beer. Our hero is still recovering from bruises sustained when he was kidnapped by the "little old lady," and had to jump to safety from her 1958 Plymouth Belvedere.
Stu's sister Maureen walks into the room. The Veggie Avenger has been sweet on Maureen ever since that day in junior high school when she told him he was immature. He straightens the collar on his faded tee shirt and tries to look casual.
Veggie Avenger: Hi Maureen.
Maureen [batting her eyelashes]: Hi Florian. [Now you know why he goes by the name of "the Veggie Avenger".]
The inning is over with the Big City Ramblers leading 5-4, and a commercial comes on the television.
Stu: Look, it's the new McDonald's ad.
Veggie Avenger [reacting to McDonalds' commercials in his usual way]: No! No! [he jumps up and down on the sofa]
Stu: I read somewhere that they make their burgers and milkshakes out of seaweed.
Veggie Avenger: No! No! The seaweed was just a binding ingredient. Most of their products are hideous, bloody, dead animal parts.
The Veggie Avenger looks at her with new hope. She's a vegetarian at heart, he thinks! He's more in love than ever. He wonders if she wants children.
Maureen [continuing]: How can anyone eat seaweed? Yuck!
With that comment the Veggie Avenger is crestfallen. On television smiling families are biting into hamburgers to the sound of patriotic music. Our hero can stand it no longer. He takes off his shoe and throws it at the set, knocking the television backwards off its stand. There is a flash of light and a puff of smoke. The music stops.
Stu: Well, that'll cost you about three hundred dollars.
Veggie Avenger [head in hands]: Oh, no... What have I done?
Maureen: I'm hungry. Anyone want to go out for a hamburger?